Demand feeding begins after the baby is a couple of weeks old, has regained his birth weight, and your milk supply is well established. A healthy baby who is older than two weeks is not going to sleep through feedings – he will most definitely let you know when he is hungry! However, you can’t assume that a newborn will let you know when he needs to eat, and that’s why it is important to wake him for feedings. Some so called “good babies” who sleep long stretches at a time have ended up losing weight and failing to thrive.
The two hour rule only applies during the early weeks, however. Once he is gaining weight steadily, and your milk supply is well established, you can let him set the pace for feedings. It really doesn’t matter whether he nurses every two hours or every four, or whether he takes one breast or two, or whether he nurses for thirty minutes or five minutes, as long as he is having good urine and stool output and gaining weight. I have seen many mothers with roly poly, thriving babies who are a month or two old who are still setting their alarms and trying to force their babies to nurse and take both breasts at a feeding, when what they really need to do is relax and follow a baby-led sleep and feeding schedule.
So, you have a newborn and you want to make sure he nurses often enough to ensure an adequate milk supply. First, you want to offer him the breast at least every two hours during the day, with possibly one three to four hour stretch at night. Time the feedings from the beginning of the feeding, and not the end. For example, if you start nursing him at 2:00, and finish it at 2:45. you still need to try to feed him again at 4:00. And yes, it is going to feel like all you are doing is nursing, burping, changing diapers, etc., but that’s just how it is for the first week or two.
Don’t plan on getting much done during this time. You’re lucky if you can fit in time to use the bathroom or take a shower. That’s why you need as much help as possible with cooking, laundry, shopping, cleaning, etc during this time. Your job is to establish your milk supply, make sure your baby gets enough to eat, and get as much rest as possible during this postpartum period. Remember that women used to stay in bed for weeks after they had a baby, and were waited on hand and foot. Ah, the good old days!
It is important to note that the time spent at the breast is not necessarily an indication of a good feeding. If he goes on the breast and sucks vigorously for a minute or two, then ‘zones out’ and sucks in his sleep for another thirty minutes, he may not have received enough of the high fat hind milk to ensure an adequate milk intake, even though the feeding took 45 minutes. The quantity and quality of the strong, nutritive sucking is just as important as the length of time spent at the breast. Babies need to suck actively at the breast for 10-15 minutes on the first breast, and then the second should be offered, although he may or may not take it.
Nursing has a tranquilizing effect on babies, which is one of the most wonderful things about it for older babies (there is no better way to put a baby to sleep) but this can be a disadvantage for newborns, who love to use the breast as a pacifier, and may not sustain a strong nutritive suck for as long as they need to. Newborns who are in a deep sleep state often seem to be almost comatose, and this can be one of the most frustrating things that new parents have to deal with.
Some causes of sleepiness in newborns include:
Here are some tips on how to encourage a sleepy baby to nurse:
If you have a sleepy baby, remember that the most important thing is making sure that he gets enough to eat. Monitor his urine and stool output and his weight gain closely, especially during the first couple of weeks. If he is not gaining weight adequately, consult a lactation professional for advice on how to increase his weight gain.
Supplement if necessary – preferably with your own expressed breast milk. Once he begins gaining weight steadily, you can relax and go to a demand feeding schedule. Soon you will be looking back on these as the ‘good old days’ : “Remember when he used to sleep all the time, and we couldn’t wake him up?”
Once you make it past the newborn stage (which seems to last forever, but trust me, it flies by) you will be able to relax and stop watching the clock, while your baby sets his own individual feeding patterns.
(Edited September , 2019)
*Please ‘Pay it Forward’!*
If you found any of the information in this article, helpful, please consider making a small donation to my favorite cause – Project Pets: Spay, Neuter, Love – all volunteer, non-profit organization that provides free spay and neuter services for homeless rescue dogs and cats…because every baby deserves a home, whether they have two legs or four! To find out more, visit Project Pets on Facebook.
Anne Smith, IBCLC
Breastfeeding Basics
Here are some tips to help your baby stay awake during feedings: Loosen or remove his coverings; hold in upright position; support breast; use football hold; increase stimulation ( change diaper, burp, talk to him, make eye contact, wipe face with damp cloth); express milk onto baby’s lips.
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